Thus Have I Had Thee, as a Dream Doth Flatter

[goodbyebird]

Thus Have I Had Thee, as a Dream Doth Flatter (31313 words) by DaraOakwise
Chapters: 8/8
Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Black Pete/Lucius Spriggs, Oluwande Boodhari/Jim Jimenez
Characters: Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Black Pete (Our Flag Means Death), Lucius Spriggs, Oluwande Boodhari, Wee John Feeney, Roach (Our Flag Means Death), The Swede (Our Flag Means Death), Spanish Jackie (Our Flag Means Death), Jim Jimenez, Frenchie (Our Flag Means Death), Fang (Our Flag Means Death), Buttons (Our Flag Means Death)
Additional Tags: post season one, Eventual fix it, Competent Stede Bonnet, Time skips between fluffy retirement and fighting to get back together, maybe not fluffy retirement but tender and gentle, and ending, Canon-Typical Violence, chapter 6 contains a brief depiction of sexual violence, and suicidal thoughts

“I suppose I could just chuck them over,” Wee John offered.

“That’s a lot of work for you, and makes you vulnerable, Wee John,” Stede said. “Grab a … there’s one. A dock and boarding plank,” Stede said, snagging a piece of wood off the deck. He stuffed it under a gap in the rail. “Wee John, if you could put your foot on the end nearest us to balance it out … perfect.” He patted the board. “Now, Captain Williams, if you could please just hop up there on the plank.”

“Fuck you,” Williams spat.

“Those emotions are valid, Captain Williams. It’s important to feel what you feel,” Stede said cheerfully.

“You don’t want to bottle that up,” the Swede said, nodding sagely.

“No,” Stede answered. “It’s very destructive. That said, Captain, I am going to need you to step up and then off the end of the plank. And then,” he turned slightly toward the rest of the captured crew. “We will get the rest of you off as quickly and efficiently as possible. Tallest to shortest, do you think?” At their murderous looks he waved a hand. “No, I agree, I don’t think it matters much either. Now Captain, if you please?”

“Do you think I should hold a sword in my hand?” Wee John asked. “You know, just in case he tries to come back aboard?”

“Oh, excellent idea Wee John. Top shelf brainstorming there.”

“It just came to me,” Wee John said proudly, and took the sword that Roach handed him.

OH MY HEART. The crew interaction in this! Stede leaning fully into piracy! Jackie! How Ed and Stede got back together! And oh, the time we get with them in the future. I loved this so much.
(also, I was so very ready for a fic where they fish Lucius out of the water and then don't immediately go running back to Ed? Like, he tried murdering your friend, maybe act like it *firm nod*.)

Comments

[goodbyebird]

Stede climbed up onto the deck of his ship, frowning as he looked up into the rigging. “Good morning, Cap’n,” Buttons said. “Good coitus I hope?”

“Yes, Mr. Buttons, it was, thank you for asking. Can you assemble the crew? We need to have a little family chat.”

Ten minutes later, they were all reluctantly on deck while Stede paced. “Look, I’m sorry to do this, but it’s time for another safety briefing,” Stede said. The crew groaned. “I know, I know. But I looked up into the rigging this morning and what did I see? No safety lines! And I understand! A bit inconvenient, maybe a little uncomfortable. It seems like a beautiful morning, no one will fall! But what if we get a rogue wave, or a sudden cannonball? And it isn’t just the danger of getting fined for safety violations! If you fall onto the deck, there’s going to be brains everywhere, and I don’t think Roach can sew brains back in. Can you Roach?”

“No,” Roach said with a shrug. “I really can’t.”

“How badly would we all feel if we had to scoop up someone’s brains and throw them over the side?”

“Bad,” the crew muttered.

“Very bad!” Stede exclaimed. “So what’s our rhyme? ‘Rigging direction …?’”

“Don’t fall?” Wee John volunteered.

“I mean, fundamentally,” Stede sighed. “Rigging direction, fall protection! That’s the rhyme!”

I mean, that's 🌟 PURE PERFECTION🌟 and I'm leaving it here so I can always find it *g*

[siyamau]

OK, the recs on this community are basically the only thing I've been bothering to read - you have VERY good taste - and I just read the first paragraph of this and it's beautifully written but I can already tell it's going to shred me, isn't it? But yeah - gonna dive into this at first opportunity, damn, there are some talented fan writers out there.

[goodbyebird]

I'm a very slow reader so I have to be judicious with the fics I don't backbutton after a couple of paragraphs *g* (also I'm a picky bitch) But others have been posting lovely recs as well! So that's been a help :)

The fic is tender and melancholy at times, but never hopeless. I think you'll really love it.