Stede climbed up onto the deck of his ship, frowning as he looked up into the rigging. “Good morning, Cap’n,” Buttons said. “Good coitus I hope?”
“Yes, Mr. Buttons, it was, thank you for asking. Can you assemble the crew? We need to have a little family chat.”
Ten minutes later, they were all reluctantly on deck while Stede paced. “Look, I’m sorry to do this, but it’s time for another safety briefing,” Stede said. The crew groaned. “I know, I know. But I looked up into the rigging this morning and what did I see? No safety lines! And I understand! A bit inconvenient, maybe a little uncomfortable. It seems like a beautiful morning, no one will fall! But what if we get a rogue wave, or a sudden cannonball? And it isn’t just the danger of getting fined for safety violations! If you fall onto the deck, there’s going to be brains everywhere, and I don’t think Roach can sew brains back in. Can you Roach?”
“No,” Roach said with a shrug. “I really can’t.”
“How badly would we all feel if we had to scoop up someone’s brains and throw them over the side?”
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Date: 2022-06-08 07:49 am (UTC)“Yes, Mr. Buttons, it was, thank you for asking. Can you assemble the crew? We need to have a little family chat.”
Ten minutes later, they were all reluctantly on deck while Stede paced. “Look, I’m sorry to do this, but it’s time for another safety briefing,” Stede said. The crew groaned. “I know, I know. But I looked up into the rigging this morning and what did I see? No safety lines! And I understand! A bit inconvenient, maybe a little uncomfortable. It seems like a beautiful morning, no one will fall! But what if we get a rogue wave, or a sudden cannonball? And it isn’t just the danger of getting fined for safety violations! If you fall onto the deck, there’s going to be brains everywhere, and I don’t think Roach can sew brains back in. Can you Roach?”
“No,” Roach said with a shrug. “I really can’t.”
“How badly would we all feel if we had to scoop up someone’s brains and throw them over the side?”
“Bad,” the crew muttered.
“Very bad!” Stede exclaimed. “So what’s our rhyme? ‘Rigging direction …?’”
“Don’t fall?” Wee John volunteered.
“I mean, fundamentally,” Stede sighed. “Rigging direction, fall protection! That’s the rhyme!”
I mean, that's 🌟 PURE PERFECTION🌟 and I'm leaving it here so I can always find it *g*